Imagine a well-dressed, cleanly shaven gentleman pulling up to a single lady's home and knocking on the front door. Her parents open it and the boy introduces himself, casually making cordial small talk before asking permission to take their daughter out on a date. Pleased by the young man's kempt appearance and mannerly outlook, they automatically agreed, with strict guidelines, of course.
As the girl steps outside, the young man offers her his jacked to shield the light rain. He walks her to the passenger side door of his car and opens it. She notices that the inside was spotless.
The two stroll along until reaching their final destination at an elegant, romantic restaurant. Conversation flows naturally throughout dinner, as the pair get to know each other's background and interests. Finishing, the boy pays for the meal and drives the lady home. He walks her to her door and thanks her with a warm smile before departing until next time. That's their first date.
As a high school student today, this first date scenario seems very foreign and unrealistic. But to older readers such as those in your parents' generation, this scenario is just a distant familiarity. That was how almost all first dates went. Over the decades, however, young traditional dating has evolved into something completely different; the technology generation.
The basic sequence of traditional dating, according to the New York Times, starts with a phone call. The two then schedule a date to get to know one another; most likely a meal, movie, or some sort of activity. Most importantly, a traditional date included face to face time together to bond and feel chemistry.
The traditional way of dating, that is picking up the phone and asking dates, required courage, planning, and an investment of ego. Today, because of texting and social media accounts, guys can just shoot over a text to any girl or girls he wants. It demanded hardly any effort and removes the need for charm. Guys today will put more effort into finding a movie to watch on Netflix than asking a girl out.
According to senior Rachel Beckwith, “the basic sequence of dating now begings with meeting the person through mutual friends or Facebook, lots of texting to get acquainted, hanging out, and then eventually one asking the other to be their girlfriend/boyfriend. The relationship then progresses to texting everyday and hanging out every other day,” she accounts.
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“The New Normal”
“ Ever since the dawn of automobile technology, the cell phone so swiftly changed the way people interact, meet, and move forward in a relationship. Texting has created a new brand of mobile etiquette, and for dating, it has given rise to new ways of flirting and defining what exactly is going on between two people.”
-Drew Johnson, political commenter
100% of JICHS students surveyed agreed that technology has changed the dating culture of teenagers today. 78% of those students also agreed that the culter has changed for the worst, rather than better. It has been studied that people are a product of their environment, and teenagers specifically tend to follow the crowd and trends. Well with the drastic increase in technology and 91% of Americans who own a cell phone, dating has been overtaken by it. Every day, people are adjusting to this mobile dependent society. Now, dating is more commonly nothing more than two people and two computers. Using the phone is becoming uncomfortable as opposed to the easy click of a button text.
83% of JICHS students claim that texting does make it less intimidating and more comfortable when beginning a relationship, and 75% of those same students state that they do in fact Facebook stalk the person before they actually date them. Are we hiding behind technology? Or merely using it as a tool to control our relationship? An anonymous sophomore gives further clarification, “Text messages making it so much easier. You can think of what to say before you say it rather than being face to face and awkward. It helps you decide whether you want to actually spend time with them before you do.”
Clinical psychologist Beverly Palmer has been researching flirting and non verbal behavior for the past five years. She maintains the belief that “texting lacks the intimacy as a voice does, which provides a huge handicap in communication and a profound loss of commitment, which is vital for a relationship. Kids and people today are hiding behind technology.”
f you walk through the hallways at school, the many people are face deep in their phones. The majority of America are dependent on their phones for everything, so it's no surprise that it has affected the traditional culture of dating so dramatically.
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The Cons of Technology in Dating
Don't get me wrong, the increase of technology isn't always a bad thing. There are pros to it, as there are cons. The benefits could include:
Technology obviously is a huge influential factor in the culture of dating. It has changed dramatically over the decades, but so has the rest of the advanced society today. People are a product of their environment, which is why it is understandable that dating has changed as fast as the advancing technology. A few generations ago, couples used to only be friends of friends or friends of family. Now, you could meet someone anywhere very attainably. Young adults are used to being overscheduled and multitasking, so this fast dating culture is no different. Men and women all over the world are adjusting to this now mobile dependent society that wasn't 20 years ago. It's now a reality.
As the girl steps outside, the young man offers her his jacked to shield the light rain. He walks her to the passenger side door of his car and opens it. She notices that the inside was spotless.
The two stroll along until reaching their final destination at an elegant, romantic restaurant. Conversation flows naturally throughout dinner, as the pair get to know each other's background and interests. Finishing, the boy pays for the meal and drives the lady home. He walks her to her door and thanks her with a warm smile before departing until next time. That's their first date.
As a high school student today, this first date scenario seems very foreign and unrealistic. But to older readers such as those in your parents' generation, this scenario is just a distant familiarity. That was how almost all first dates went. Over the decades, however, young traditional dating has evolved into something completely different; the technology generation.
The basic sequence of traditional dating, according to the New York Times, starts with a phone call. The two then schedule a date to get to know one another; most likely a meal, movie, or some sort of activity. Most importantly, a traditional date included face to face time together to bond and feel chemistry.
The traditional way of dating, that is picking up the phone and asking dates, required courage, planning, and an investment of ego. Today, because of texting and social media accounts, guys can just shoot over a text to any girl or girls he wants. It demanded hardly any effort and removes the need for charm. Guys today will put more effort into finding a movie to watch on Netflix than asking a girl out.
According to senior Rachel Beckwith, “the basic sequence of dating now begings with meeting the person through mutual friends or Facebook, lots of texting to get acquainted, hanging out, and then eventually one asking the other to be their girlfriend/boyfriend. The relationship then progresses to texting everyday and hanging out every other day,” she accounts.
--------------------------------
“The New Normal”
“ Ever since the dawn of automobile technology, the cell phone so swiftly changed the way people interact, meet, and move forward in a relationship. Texting has created a new brand of mobile etiquette, and for dating, it has given rise to new ways of flirting and defining what exactly is going on between two people.”
-Drew Johnson, political commenter
100% of JICHS students surveyed agreed that technology has changed the dating culture of teenagers today. 78% of those students also agreed that the culter has changed for the worst, rather than better. It has been studied that people are a product of their environment, and teenagers specifically tend to follow the crowd and trends. Well with the drastic increase in technology and 91% of Americans who own a cell phone, dating has been overtaken by it. Every day, people are adjusting to this mobile dependent society. Now, dating is more commonly nothing more than two people and two computers. Using the phone is becoming uncomfortable as opposed to the easy click of a button text.
83% of JICHS students claim that texting does make it less intimidating and more comfortable when beginning a relationship, and 75% of those same students state that they do in fact Facebook stalk the person before they actually date them. Are we hiding behind technology? Or merely using it as a tool to control our relationship? An anonymous sophomore gives further clarification, “Text messages making it so much easier. You can think of what to say before you say it rather than being face to face and awkward. It helps you decide whether you want to actually spend time with them before you do.”
Clinical psychologist Beverly Palmer has been researching flirting and non verbal behavior for the past five years. She maintains the belief that “texting lacks the intimacy as a voice does, which provides a huge handicap in communication and a profound loss of commitment, which is vital for a relationship. Kids and people today are hiding behind technology.”
f you walk through the hallways at school, the many people are face deep in their phones. The majority of America are dependent on their phones for everything, so it's no surprise that it has affected the traditional culture of dating so dramatically.
---------------------------------------------
The Cons of Technology in Dating
- ·More Texting than Dates- The increase of texting has lead to a decrease in face to face communication which downplays intimacy. According to the NY times, more couples are exchanging instant messages and Facebook posts rather than going out to an actual date together.
- ·Lowered Barriers to Entry- Guys don't have to put as much effort into getting into a relationship as before and can send as many messages to as many girls as they want. This can lead to insecurity and jealousy.
- ·Facebook- More and more people “Facebook stalk” other people so much that they have run out of small talk and ruined the first date.
Don't get me wrong, the increase of technology isn't always a bad thing. There are pros to it, as there are cons. The benefits could include:
- -Safety issues and reassurance
- -Awareness of STD's, health
- -Easier communication if in a long distance relationship or unreachable
- -Comfortability
- -Knowing in advance before wasting time if you do not click
Technology obviously is a huge influential factor in the culture of dating. It has changed dramatically over the decades, but so has the rest of the advanced society today. People are a product of their environment, which is why it is understandable that dating has changed as fast as the advancing technology. A few generations ago, couples used to only be friends of friends or friends of family. Now, you could meet someone anywhere very attainably. Young adults are used to being overscheduled and multitasking, so this fast dating culture is no different. Men and women all over the world are adjusting to this now mobile dependent society that wasn't 20 years ago. It's now a reality.